I didn’t wake up one morning thinking, I’m going to design my own engagement ring. But the more I thought about what this piece of jewellery meant…how it would sit on my hand for a lifetime, how it would symbolize the relationship I was building, the more I realized I didn’t want to leave it up to chance. Or tradition.
So I designed it.
Not to be “extra.” Not to be difficult. But to be intentional.
And now, every time I look down at my ring, I don’t just see love. I see clarity. I see collaboration. I see a story that started not at the proposal, but at the design table.
Designing Your Own Ring Isn’t Selfish, It’s Empowering!
Let’s get this out of the way: choosing to design your own ring doesn’t make you controlling or unromantic. It makes you present.
We design our homes. We style our wardrobes. We curate how we show up in the world. So why would we leave something as permanent and personal as an engagement ring entirely in someone else’s hands?
This isn’t about undermining your partner’s gesture. It’s about co-creating a symbol of what you’re building together.
The Ring You Wear Every Day Should Reflect You
Your engagement ring isn’t just a moment, it’s a forever accessory. You’ll wear it when you’re running errands. In meetings. While holding coffee. While holding hands.
So it should feel like you. Not like your best friend’s Pinterest board.
Designing your own ring means it fits your life, your aesthetic, and your values. It’s yours. Not just in sentiment, but in shape, texture, origin, and intention.
From Vision to Forever: The Process Can Be Magical
The experience of designing my ring was anything but clinical. It was creative. Collaborative. Surprisingly emotional.
Working with a designer helped turn what could’ve felt intimidating into something deeply empowering. From the first sketch to the final polish, the process carried me from vision to forever. I wasn’t just picking a ring. I was telling a story.
And that story included things I never would’ve thought about if I’d gone the traditional route—like ethical sourcing, recycled metals, low-profile settings, and unique stone cuts that felt like me.
It’s Not Just About the Look. It’s About the Meaning.
When I designed my ring, I got to build layers of meaning into it. A subtle nod to where we met. A hidden gem representing a lost loved one. A texture that reminded me of water—something that’s always brought me peace.
These weren’t things you find on a shelf. They were things you build in.
According to The Knot, more people are designing custom rings now than ever. And it’s not about flash…it’s about feeling connected.
Breaking the Myth: Surprise Doesn’t Equal Love
There’s this myth that a ring only counts if it’s a surprise. But ask yourself: are we really measuring love by secrecy? Or by how well we can guess someone’s taste?
True intimacy isn’t about keeping someone in the dark. It’s about bringing them into the light. Letting them say what they want. Honouring who they are.
And if you’re the one proposing? Imagine how much more powerful that moment is when the ring feels like your partner’s reflection, not your assumption.
Who Should Design Their Own Ring?
Anyone who:
- Has a clear sense of personal style
- Cares about ethical sourcing or sustainability
- Wants a ring that doesn’t look like everyone else’s
- Sees jewellery as storytelling, not just sparkle
- Values co-creation as part of their love stor
If that’s you, this path is more than worth exploring.
How to Start Designing a Ring (Without Overwhelm)
If you’re even considering going the custom route, here’s what helped me:
- Get inspired, but don’t get boxed in. Use photos, stones, textures—whatever speaks to you.
- Find the right partner. A great jeweller won’t just take your ideas—they’ll guide, translate, and elevate them. Look for someone like Alexis Gallery who specializes in translating personality into fine jewellery.
- Ask questions. Where is the stone from? Can you mix metals? How does the setting hold up in daily life?
- Don’t rush. This is your forever piece. It should take time.
- Trust your gut. When you know, you know.
Final Thought: Designing Isn’t Just About Jewellery—It’s About Agency
Designing my own engagement ring gave me something I didn’t know I needed: agency.
It was a reminder that I get to shape not just my relationship, but how I mark it. That I don’t have to accept default settings on a ring or in life. And that meaningful doesn’t have to mean traditional.
So if you’re standing at the start of forever, wondering whether you should take the leap and design your ring, let me just say:
Do it.
Your story deserves to be told in every facet.
